That clip is a treasure. What an adventure to have at 16. She reminds me of my cousin, who decided t

Last week, during a particularly depressing, overcast, autumnal day, I decided to clear out the loft. I say loft, but after converting most of it into a third bedroom, all we have left are some hidden eaves which look like the sorts of places royal caribbean cruise ship where people used to hide from the Gestapo.
Getting into the eaves requires royal caribbean cruise ship a Houdini-like dexterity, as the space is so narrow. Getting out is even harder, reminding me of the claustrophobic tunnel scenes in The Great Escape. On several occasions, when my wife has failed to hear my hysterical shouting, I've had to phone her and ask to be rescued.
Fortunately, this time I seemed to be more pliable (perhaps six weeks away from the 9 to 5 routine has relaxed my tensed muscles?) and managed to move around easily, unpacking boxes that had remained unopened since we moved here ten years ago.
The woman pushing twigs into the kettle was my mother's sister, royal caribbean cruise ship Patricia Eunice Dorothy Prior, who worked as a midwife in a small town at the foot of the Atlas Mountains, in Morocco. Officially royal caribbean cruise ship she was a missionary, sponsored by a number of churches in Britain, but as it was against the law to promote any religion other than Islam, my aunt had to limit her activities to good works.
Pat grew up in a family of six who lived in the upstairs royal caribbean cruise ship half of a small, terraced royal caribbean cruise ship house. She shared a bed with her two sisters and at night she would lie awake listening to the sound of mice scuttling across the floor.
Her parents' ambitions for her were typical for their background: royal caribbean cruise ship at 14 she could either go into service or get a job in a shop. But Pat was bright. She passed her 11 Plus and got into Richmond Grammar School, where she sat her final exams during an air raid.
If Pat had come from another royal caribbean cruise ship background she might have gone to university, but higher education was never an option. Fortunately, her parents royal caribbean cruise ship didn t object when Pat announced that she wished to train as a nurse.
By all accounts Pat was an exceptional student and the skills she learned at West Middlesex Hospital would prove invaluable a few years later, when she decided to train to become royal caribbean cruise ship a missionary. In Pat s words, she had a calling and felt compelled to pursue it. A gruelling training at Bible College followed, during which Pat had to learn to become fluent at reading royal caribbean cruise ship and writing royal caribbean cruise ship Arabic.
I can t begin to imagine what it must have been like for Pat when she first arrived in Morocco, where a young, single woman was a second-class citizen. However, during the next 25 years, my aunt carved out a successful life for herself, respected by everyone in the community.
When I was 16, Pat invited me to stay with her. We couldn t afford to travel as a family, so I flew alone to Casablanca and met my aunt at the airport. It was a 300km journey to her home and, as we drove south, my preconceived royal caribbean cruise ship notions of an arid, desert-like country were replaced by vivid memories of lush pine forests, snow-capped royal caribbean cruise ship mountains royal caribbean cruise ship and orange-blossom scented air.
It was a culture shock. I had grown up in a dull London suburb, where evening meals alternated royal caribbean cruise ship between fish fingers and beef burgers. Suddenly, I was plunged into an alien world of strange food, exotic landscapes and opulent souks.
I had been terrified of eating the local food (particularly when I learned that I would have to eat everything royal caribbean cruise ship that was put in front of me), but I needn t have worried. After two weeks of dates, artichokes, couscous, mint tea and carrot and orange salad, I learned that eating could be a pleasure as well as a necessity.
Morocco changed my life. It awakened me to a new, sensual world of smell, taste and colour. But, more importantly, for the first time in my life I learned to see my own society more objectively, realising that happiness was not related to GDP.
I was in a privileged position royal caribbean cruise ship in many ways. As my aunt enjoyed some prestige in the local area, we were invited into several homes and I was struck by the contrast between royal caribbean cruise ship the public and private worlds of the local people. Outside, I only saw impoverished-looking mud-brick walls and austere, veiled women. Inside, the veils came down and I found myself in colourful, comfortable royal caribbean cruise ship rooms, full of laughter and conversation.
royal caribbean cruise ship I had arrived at the right time too. Television aerials were starting to appear on buildings, but the town was still largely cut off from the outside world. As a European, I could have encountered some hostility, but the days of French colonialism belonged to a past generation and religious enmities belonged to a future one. I was treated as an honoured guest.
When I returned royal caribbean cruise ship home, I felt very depressed for a while. I looked royal caribbean cruise ship out of my bedroom window at the different shades of grey, from the slate roofs of houses to the low-lying clouds, and yearned for blue skies, prickly pears and orange blossom. I could see why my aunt didn t want to come home.
Nine years later, my aunt was reluctantly contemplating retirement in Britain. She would have to swap social status and a large house for the genteel poverty of a state pension and a pokey flat. I think she dreaded it.
Pat came home for a short visit to sort out her affairs royal caribbean cruise ship and work out where she was going to live. On the last day, I said goodbye to my aunt and wanted to hug her, but Pat wasn t a physically demonstrative person and I was afraid royal caribbean cruise ship that I might unnerve her, as if we were saying goodbye for the last time.
The next day Pat arrived at Tangiers Airport and was planning to get a lift home from a friend, but a Moroccan lawyer was waiting for her and insisted that she travelled royal caribbean cruise ship with him instead. He was interested royal caribbean cruise ship in buying her house and wanted to get her signature on some of the legal documents. They argued for a few minutes until Pat finally agreed.
Most of my aunt s friends were Christians and their attempts royal caribbean cruise ship to find some meaning in her death only increased my sense of the utter futility of it. I couldn t accept the argument that some crude form of divine intervention had spared my aunt the horrors of retired life in England. I know that she would have made a successful new life for herself royal caribbean cruise ship and been a doting great-aunt to my sons.
My aunt s death was tragic and pointless, however royal caribbean cruise ship her life certainly wasn t, because I know that in a small town 2000 miles away, there are dozens, royal caribbean cruise ship perhaps hundreds of lives that wouldn t have been lived without her.
Steerforth, I ve just read this and feel a bit run over by a truck. I d been off Blogger all week and dipped back in, today, to see what everyone was up to. I didn t expect this. I m constantly blindsided by evil; like all of us, dogged by injustice and at an utter loss as to how to make heads or tails of it. You have rendered this telling masterfully, packed so much emotion without a single whistle or bell. I m grieved, deeply, by what you ve written. I have been spending a lot of time recently thinking about families, small clusterings of people that extend into larger groups and, if allowed, mold and shape our narrow existences into a roomier experience of this absurd business of being human. I m rambling terribly royal caribbean cruise ship but I just wanted royal caribbean cruise ship to honor your aunt Pat with my words. That is all. You are an accomplished wordsmith.
Your aunt sounds like a most remarkable person, as are you Steerforth. I am sure she would be very proud of you and your family. Thank you for sharing these lovely memories with those of us in blogland royal caribbean cruise ship who will probably never travel to Morocco. At least not now, in the current political climate. God bless, Carol
What a remarkable lady. Makes the typical gap-year charity royal caribbean cruise ship jaunt seem like work experience royal caribbean cruise ship at a creche. I think you re right, she would have made the most of her retirement. There is no explanation for such tragedy, but I can almost hear a voice telling her your work here is done . Did she inspire many of your decisions royal caribbean cruise ship as an adult?
What a fascinating, interesting story. I heard something slightly similar on radio 4 recently and both have brought home the different types of lives women faced in those days. I am really sorry your aunt didn t have the chance to settle into a life back here. I am sure she would have sorted royal caribbean cruise ship it out, but at least she had a very interesting, satisfying life.
Thank you so much for the wonderful comments. I posted this entry a couple of hours ago, wondering if anyone would really want to read such a long piece about my aunt. Then I went out for a curry (it s Friday evening here). royal caribbean cruise ship Two hours later, it s really gratifying royal caribbean cruise ship to see that it struck a chord. Her life (and death) had a big impact on me and finding the cine film the other day bought it all back. Kid - The friend my aunt was supposed to travel home with was also at the airport and witnessed the conversation royal caribbean cruise ship between my aunt and the lawyer - I should have made that clear, but I was trying to keep it brief. Suze - Yes, I found it hard to make sense of things. I d inhabited a comfortable but childish world of causality and it took time to accept royal caribbean cruise ship the stark reality of the situation. But on the plus side, knowing that people might die tomorrow has made me place more value on the relationships I have with them today. Lucy - I think my aunt had a very big influence on me. Every few years, royal caribbean cruise ship she came to live with us for six months royal caribbean cruise ship and we talked about all sorts of things. I m sure that without her example, I would have made different decisions.
That clip is a treasure. What an adventure to have at 16. She reminds me of my cousin, who decided to spend his life in Japan as a translator. royal caribbean cruise ship More to the point, I think of Charles de Foucauld , who was called to live a life of witness and service among the Tuaregs of Algeria.
Without a doubt, one of the best written posts I ve read, in more than two years of blogging. I can easily understand how your Aunt Pat was an inspiration to you. The word verification is corker, by-the-way.
Thanks for the Wikipedia link Brett - a really interesting article. Thank you Martin! I really wasn t sure if anyone would be interested royal caribbean cruise ship in my aunt, so I m very pleased that this post has struck a chord.
What a wonderful tr